Return of the Knicker Line
May 23rd 2008 08:03
Oh good lord, the g-string is apparently out. Which means that the knicker line is apparently back. It seems women everywhere are turning their back on the trusty g-string and returning to the full brief, which ultimately means a return to that good old clearly visible underwear parade no matter how much the concept horrifies us.
Regardless of women’s unshakeable faith in advertising of the Bonds kind, those no panty line knickers actually do leave a line. Only tonight I discovered my new gay flatmate also wears g-strings because he is appalled by the thought of knicker lines as a man. Not only was his explanation of the full brief panty line hilarious, it was frighteningly apt. You really can see them no matter what you wear, and you really do end up looking like your ass is twice the size it really is. I have invested in the “no lines” underwear in the hopes of swapping the up the butt variety for something less intrusive. Trust me, there are lines.
The most common argument for the full brief is comfort, which I totally do not buy, nor do other avid g-string wearers I have broached this subject with. Yes, having a thin piece of cotton between your lower cheeks for many hours per day can at times be somewhat irritating, but it’s nowhere near as irritating as three times that amount of fabric slowly creeping in that direction anyway. Full briefs do not stay put, regardless of how tight your jeans are. They creep. And if its all going to end up in there anyway, less is clearly going to be more.
If you are opposed enough to the g-string to join the boycott, there are other underwear options, I will admit. French knickers, although still guilty of giving a less than flattering bum dividing line when you’re wearing a dress, or a skirt, or trousers….or pretty much anything for that matter…are still a whole lot sexier than Bridget Jones underwear. You still have a choice if comfort is your top option ladies! Don’t believe the hype – full briefs are not the be all and end all. Boy legs are cute sexy although again, if you’re donning your tightest ensemble it’s unlikely you will be as free of lines as if you pulled on your tiny g-banger. No matter what you’re planning to put on, I beg that you choose your underwear carefully, and even more important – actually check your ass out before you leave the house! If you can see your knickers, we can see them too. And that is not the reason you want to be attracting attention to your derrière.
When you look at the increasing popularity of stores like Agent Provocateur the demise of the g-string seems like an oxymoron. I don’t imagine many of us would wander into such a raunchy store and leave with granny pants. But ultimately what matters is you feel sexy in your underwear, whether that be French knickers, full on nana pants or your teeniest tiniest g-string. But when feeling sexy please consider the viewing pleasure of those around you…and if the full panty line is glaringly obvious - as sexy as you may be feeling - those around you possibly won’t agree.
Regardless of women’s unshakeable faith in advertising of the Bonds kind, those no panty line knickers actually do leave a line. Only tonight I discovered my new gay flatmate also wears g-strings because he is appalled by the thought of knicker lines as a man. Not only was his explanation of the full brief panty line hilarious, it was frighteningly apt. You really can see them no matter what you wear, and you really do end up looking like your ass is twice the size it really is. I have invested in the “no lines” underwear in the hopes of swapping the up the butt variety for something less intrusive. Trust me, there are lines.
The most common argument for the full brief is comfort, which I totally do not buy, nor do other avid g-string wearers I have broached this subject with. Yes, having a thin piece of cotton between your lower cheeks for many hours per day can at times be somewhat irritating, but it’s nowhere near as irritating as three times that amount of fabric slowly creeping in that direction anyway. Full briefs do not stay put, regardless of how tight your jeans are. They creep. And if its all going to end up in there anyway, less is clearly going to be more.
If you are opposed enough to the g-string to join the boycott, there are other underwear options, I will admit. French knickers, although still guilty of giving a less than flattering bum dividing line when you’re wearing a dress, or a skirt, or trousers….or pretty much anything for that matter…are still a whole lot sexier than Bridget Jones underwear. You still have a choice if comfort is your top option ladies! Don’t believe the hype – full briefs are not the be all and end all. Boy legs are cute sexy although again, if you’re donning your tightest ensemble it’s unlikely you will be as free of lines as if you pulled on your tiny g-banger. No matter what you’re planning to put on, I beg that you choose your underwear carefully, and even more important – actually check your ass out before you leave the house! If you can see your knickers, we can see them too. And that is not the reason you want to be attracting attention to your derrière.
When you look at the increasing popularity of stores like Agent Provocateur the demise of the g-string seems like an oxymoron. I don’t imagine many of us would wander into such a raunchy store and leave with granny pants. But ultimately what matters is you feel sexy in your underwear, whether that be French knickers, full on nana pants or your teeniest tiniest g-string. But when feeling sexy please consider the viewing pleasure of those around you…and if the full panty line is glaringly obvious - as sexy as you may be feeling - those around you possibly won’t agree.
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